“I can’t believe I did that!” Ever had that sensation, when you look back and wonder what the hell happened? Article by Dominic Irvine, founding partner of boutique leadership and development consultancy Epiphanies LLP.
In the cold light of day it seems so stupid. It might be as simple as eating far too much despite your every intention of sticking to your healthy eating plan. Or it could be finding yourself in a meeting room debating with colleagues in the organisation how others have behaved in a way that seems to defy logic. I’ve experienced many such conversations over the years. It’s wearisome. Maybe it’s because I too have found myself doing things in the heat of the moment I’ve later regretted. More likely it’s a phenomenon that the economist Lowenstein calls the ‘Hot-cold’ empathy gap.
When you are in the hot state, for example right in the middle of choosing your lunch options, you are likely to under-estimate how much your decisions are affected by the state you are in – hungry and in a lunch queue – rather than the ‘cold’ dispassionate analysis of your situation. The opposite is also true. When you are in a ‘cold’ state – e.g. you’ve had your lunch and you are now contemplating what you will eat for dinner – you will fail to fully appreciate the impact your state at dinner time will have on the choices you make. Similarly, someone who is not in the same state as you may not fully appreciate what it really feels like.
Unbelievable
Breaking habits is difficult. Breaking habits under pressure is even more so. In the previous article, I talked about the despair felt by the IT Director of a logistics company that the drivers in the firm would insist in re-scanning goods before they loaded their vans. In the ‘cold’ light of day it made perfect sense. But it shows a lack of empathy for the drivers. Under significant pressure from management to increase their effectiveness and with an expanding workload the drivers are trying to do the best they can. I spent time with the drivers and I saw them skip breaks and take questionable risks in an attempt to meet ever tougher targets. They may not have been achieving the targets, but it was not for want of trying. Over years they have developed the habit of re-scanning as it was incredibly effective in the past, and now their difficulty is breaking the habit. In the heat of the moment, the drivers are doing what they’ve always done – but faster. The trouble is, in the ‘cold light of day’ the behaviour of the drivers seems incredulous. Why would they not want to do it the right way?Those of you with bad habits – like buying a chocolate bar when you fill up the car with fuel, or in the habit of drinking every night, will testify how hard it is to break the routine.
Under pressure
Paradoxically, the pressure from management to change behaviour exacerbates the problem. Neal and Wood’s research into habits has shown that when we put people under pressure (in their research it was students studying for exams), people tend to default to their habits – both good and bad. It’s as if we simply don’t have the bandwidth to cope with the effort required to be vigilant to changing our habit and do everything else as well. The message is clear, if we want people to change their habits we need to give them the bandwidth to be able to do this. But there is one more important lesson worth considering.
Experience it
I recall attending a meeting in the same logistics company where an incredibly bright member of the finance team set out the clear logic of what people on the front line needed to do to hit the business targets. It made perfect sense, was delivered in a compelling way and many people in the room were won over. I got talking to the presenter later and it turned out that neither he, nor any of his colleagues had actually spent any time on the front line experiencing what the job entailed. Worse, due to a relocation of the headquarters, almost all the finance team were new and with a few exceptions their time in the business was less than a year.
There was no appreciation of what being a delivery driver meant in terms of repeatedly getting in and out of a van in all weathers, all day, loading and unloading parcels, coping with traffic, school runs, roadworks, flooding, and IT equipment that did not do what it was meant to do. Not only was there a hot-cold empathy gap there was a complete lack of understanding. Years ago, when total quality management was all the rage, ‘going to the gemba’ was a key part of the process. In essence – going to where the action takes place to better understand what’s happening. I find it depressing that I come across so many senior managers who rarely get out and visit the front line and spend some time experiencing the challenges and seeing the consequences of decisions taken in the warm comfort of a corporate office.
Oiling the wheels
Given all of this, I have two requests. Firstly: Next time you find yourself struggling to understand why someone has done what they have done ask yourself:Have I ever eaten way more than I should have done? Have I failed to exercise when I know I should? Have I ever got carried away and done something I later regretted? If the answer to any or all of these 3 questions is ‘yes’, now go back and consider why they did what they did and see if you can bridge the ‘hot-cold’ empathy gap.
Secondly: Get out and spend some time with the people on the front line. Do their job for a few hours. Watch, listen and learn – not to criticise but to understand. Let the experience sink in and use it as a frame of reference when thinking about what it is you need them to do. The ‘front-line’ goes beyond work. Why not remind yourself what it’s like training in the cold and dark in winter when you take your child to sports practice as but one example.And if you can do these two things, you’ll be all the richer a manager / parent / human for it. You’ll make better decisions and gain much respect.
